Why are we here?

   Why are we here? Whats the purpose for our existence? So many questions and yet no answers to definetely answer the questions. I’ve asked my self these questions time and time again and always come to the same conclusion – I don’t know! I’ve came to the conclusion that racking my brain over questions like these has really no significance on my day to day life. I’ve decided to live my life to the best of my ability and to sustain a humane/natural view of the everyday world. To me, all life is sacred. It doesn’t matter how big or how small, I believe all living things has the right to live just as I do. It angers me when I see someone stepping on a bug just because they can. In my mind what gives those kind of people the right to take anothers existence just because they feel that all living life is beneath them. Humans have always had a pseudo-entitlement to world and its resources, well at least modern man has. We take what we want, when we want and we don’t have any empathy for the eco-systems or biota that we destroy. It makes me wonder how the ancient civilizations were able to flourish for as long as they did. Our modern existence is literally a snap of the fingers when it comes to geographic time. The modern estimate of the earths age is about 4 billion years. It’s so easy to say BILLION, it’s only a two syllable word. The word itself really has no meaning to most people and is used as a quick terminology when people try to carry on an intellectual conversation. To me, the word is in fathomable. I can’t even begin to imagine the amount of time that 4 billion years represents, but what I do try to fathom is how many species and civilizations populated this planet over that span of time. It seems like were finding more and more evidence to support the claims that civilization goes back further than we have ever imagined. Whether it be the Sumerians, ancient Chinese, Egyptians, Mesopetamians, Indus or even cavemen, our story goes back further than we have ever imagined. Like the book “Forbidden Archaeology” by Michael Cremo, I often conspiracize about the discoveries that have been hidden to protect our modern understanding of the world or our pseudo-understanding of the world. I mean, how were the ancient Egyptions able to thrive for thousands of years or how were the Sumerians able to do the same. How did so many cultures have a detailed knowledge of astronomy and how were they able to engineer the largest and most complex structures ever assempled on earth without the aid of modern computers or machinery. At one time the entire world was inhabited by people who for some reason used pyramids as their grand structures? This may sound way out there, but what if ancient society was all interlinked just as we are today? We describe the enigma as alien astronomers. Interferrence from an alien civilization that kick started modern man as we know today. To me it makes sense especially from the view point of genetics. Take the HAR-1 gene for example. Every mammal has this gene so it would seem that every mammal should be different. The problem is that the human har-1 gene has had 18 mutations oner the past million years. That doesn’t sound like alot but the har-1 gene is only 118 base pairs long. The human DNA has a total of 3.1 billion base pairs, so when you compare 118 to 3.1 billion its amazing. Whats so amazing about this gene is the fact that every human on planet earth has the exact same 18 mutations at the same spots on the gene. all these mutations happened within a million years, in evolutionary time thas impossible. The odds of every human carrying the exact same mutations on the exact same point is the equivilent to winning the powerball, being struck by lightning, getting imapacted by a meteor while being attacked by a great white shark all at the same time. The importance of this gene is the effect it has on every human. At the exact same time in embryonic development this gene translates proteins that aids in the development of the neocortex. The area of the brain that functions for logic, language ability, reasoning, mathematic skills, etc,etc….In essence this gene makes humans human. In other mammals this gene only has two variants, so why in humans is there 18 and why is it the exact same for every person? Some refer to this gene as the god gene and I can see why, but what if the Sumerians were right? What if their gods, the Annunaki, deliberately altered this gene to create a slave species in their own image? After all the Sumerians go back all the way to 6,000 BC. Supposedly when man was coming out of the stone age all of a sudden there was this civilization that had an advanced knowledge of mathematics, language, engineering and astronomy. Once again their culture like so many others was dominated by the stars. I know i’ve gone off track from the initail premise of this blog, but the truth to our existence is so amazingly weird it truly fascinates me. Were the stories of the bible true? After all the bible is derived from Sumerian legends. Adam and Eve, the name given to the newly formed slaves by the Annunaki was Adama – coincidence, you decide. All i’m saying is that we need to question the textbooks that teach us of our existence. What if God is an alien species? After all isn’t God an alien to begin with. He or she isn’t from this earth and all the bible atates is that we were created in the image of him. I believe that evolution and creationism go hand and hand. You can’t deny the proof of evolution and you cannot deny that we are all part of something much bigger than ourselves. If we destroy ourselve, life will continue. We all share the same energy, no matter how big or small and I believe that once we all truly believe that this planet isn’t ours and that our life is an energy that we borrow and one day we must return it, maybe we will all move forward and attain the enlightenment of existance…

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Dreams 5/13/10

   I always dream, but I never remember my dreams. The past couple of nights have been an odd exception though. Now for some reason i’m remembering all of my dreams and theyre becoming more real and much more graphic. The night of the 13th I went to bed at about 10:30. I usually go to bed about this time almost every night, but sometimes its later depending on the movie i’m watching or the the book i’m reading. This was the first night that I actively began to remember my dreams in incredible detail. Note, I often remember my dreams, but its always in bits and pieces–kind of like a slideshow with missing slides.

The first night’s dreams…  I was in the old house that I grew up in. I felt out of time, like I was a visitor. I walked down the main hallway and into the living room. There in the old grey and cigarette burned chair was my dad, like he always was. As soon as I saw him I exploded into a fit of rage. I told him “You need to go, you are no longer welcome here and we were all tired of your bullshit. Your negativity and complete disrespect for evryone in this house”. Then like a scene from a time travel movie – I was in the drivers seat of an old RV my dad used to own. In the passenger side seat was my dad, just like the way he was the last time I saw him. I had a complete change of attitude, it was like days had passed but I knew he was just in his recliner. I told him,”Dad I forgive you for what you did, but we are all better off without you here. I know we had a big argument three days before you committed suicide, but I don’t regret any of it. You put all of us especially mom and myself through so much. You need to leave. I need to find closure and with you gone everyone is much better off.”. He then told me, “It was your fault and I will never leave!” Just like good ole dad, he didn’t just say it–he yelled it. Then I woke up. When I awoke, it was as if he was right there. Before I had went to sleep that evening, I had the strange feeling that someone was watching me. Even as I write this I find myself looking away from the screenand just looking into nothingness. The dream still has me bothered because it felt so real. I don’t know what to think! The next dream I had that night was a bit more complicated and like the dream of my dad, this one felt wickedly real as well!

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Who am I?

   Who am I is a question that I think alot of people ask themselves. Human curiosity has always been the driving force that seeks the answer to the question. Many define themselves by the religion they believe in or by the work they do. Myself, it’s a passionate and complex question that seems to raise more questions than answers. Religion doesn’t define my character because I don’t believe in organized religion. Work doesn’t define me because like so many others I work to live and not live to work. The answer I seek lies in the fabric of time that has brought me to the present.

   The only reason why I am here writing this blog is because of the sequence of events thats occured over the span of millions of years. I’m not trying to define my character, but I am trying to understand from an evolutionary stand point why i’m here.

   Religion has never played an influential role in my development. As a wee one I was forced to accept the philosophy of Catholicism. Every sunday my mother, brother and I all went to mass, sometimes we attended the 09:30 or 11am mass, but I always felt out of place. Every wednesday my brother and I would board the putrid green bus that pumped out vast clouds of black exhaust that took us to the St. Rose of Lima catholic church so we could absorb and live the words of the bible. I always felt like an outcast when we attended the weekly class or sunday mass. I used to think something was wrong with me because everyone else understood the meaning of faith and the power of God, but I never did. While we attended mass my father would stay home. I think he pushed us out the door just so he could have some down time. Regardless for reasons beyond me, I could never understand how people could have complete blind faith in a mythilogical diety?

   As I got older, into my teens, I wasn’t forced to go as much. My mom realized just how much I didn’t enjoy going, but it wasn’t just that, she knew I just didn’t believe. Whenever we would read scripture the only thing that would cross my mind was how could people believe in a book that has been written and rewritten over and over and was based on hearsay spanning the course of hundreds of years. What the bible meant to me was that it was the basis of wars and the division of society. I knew from my history classes that the clergy of men who were priests from the time jesus was crucified through the midieval time periods were men who portrayed traits of satan and not god. I believed that the people who were self proclaimed servants of god used the bible for money, greed and power. Most people all the way through the 1800’s were illeterate and just common farmers, blacksmiths and servants. Only the rich could afford an education, with an education they made more money, more money meant higher standings within the church and a higher standing with the church meant you could treat poor people like filth and scum because money brought you closer to god. Who knows how many people died because of accusations of herecy and were slaughtered because of a belief in other dieties. My point is that the church in my mind represented the icon of humanities dark side.

   As I grew older I began to form my own ideas of religion, but I realized that religion wasn’t the answer. As I began to study other religions I began to see a common theme amongst all of them. It may have been a different god and different beliefs but the common values were the same. Each had its own ideas for how to live a good life. People have always been afraid of death and religion gave people the pseudo feeling of entitlement to the planet and the after life, but even though the religions of the world have a common theme the one thing they all share that can be physically manifested is WAR!

   How can something that teaches you to be a better person lead to such carnage and destruction. Easy, when one believes strongly in theyre religion – everyone else is below them. In some ways religion was the birth of racism. It seems like different nationalities and colors of skin was the foundation of every religion. Therefore I began to believe in biological evolution and the natural order of selection, but it didn’t stop there. Evolution still raised more unanswered questions.


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